Okay, let’s be honest:
Thanksgiving is the biggest scam holiday of the year.
I love gratitude. I love carbs. I love my family.
But what I don’t love is spending my entire day in the kitchen like I’m competing on MasterChef… for a meal that lasts 4 minutes and 27 seconds.
Here’s the breakdown:
1. The Meal Prep Is Basically a Full-Time Job
You are chopping. Stirring. Basting. Baking.
You’re sweating like the turkey is chasing you.
Your kitchen turns into a culinary war zone.
And for what?
2. The Eating Part Is Over Before You Sit Down
Everyone rushes the table like a Black Friday sale.
They inhale the food.
Nobody tastes anything.
Nobody appreciates the “notes of rosemary.”
It’s gone before the gravy stops steaming.
Meanwhile you’re still in the kitchen looking like:
Did I… did I do all that for THIS??
3. And Then You Clean for the Rest of the Night
Thanksgiving is the only holiday where the cleanup lasts longer than the celebration.
You’re scrubbing pots the size of small planets.
Someone always leaves dishes “to soak” (aka: your problem).
Everyone else? Sitting. Full. Useless.
4. Emotional Labor? Off the Charts
You planned the menu, the seating, the timing, the vibes.
You managed everyone’s dietary restrictions, personal drama, and “I don’t like turkey” energy.
You basically produced a Broadway show.
No applause.
So Why Do We Do It?
Because we’re women.
We create. We host. We love.
Even when Thanksgiving feels like a group project where only WE did the work.
But STILL — I stand by it:
Thanksgiving was definitely invented by someone who never had to cook or clean.
